Chapter 1



I'd draw you a portrait, but you wouldn't be amused. It would bore you. You would yawn - and tell me to stop. I don't blame you: you cannot help being stupid.

She caught me by my hand, and dragged me there. She looked cute, and so, I let her. Besides, I wanted to see where this place was.

We reached a house. A big, brown, disgusting house, with a garden and a fence. The fence was painted black, with yellow speckles. The atmosphere was that of decadence. Of decadence and fear. I loved it.

I asked her how she knew about the house. She was to young, too immature. She was only 9 years old, goddammit.

She looked at me, and smiled. She seemed to think I was better off with my mouth shut.

I was about to enter the house, but she stopped me. She made me bend down, and kissed my cheek. Then, wishing me luck, she disappeared. I knew I'd see her again, of course, but I didn't want to. She makes me cry.

Chapter 2

I entered the house, and looked around. The house, I found, was quite familiar. It was as if I had been there before. Strange.

Somebody called out to me. A tall, handsome man, with shaggy, brown hair. He greeted me and asked me whether I remembered him. He said his name was Wolf.

I shook my head and said I didn't. I had never seen him before. He smiled and told me not to kid around. With nothing to lose, I decided to play along.

Aren't you - I asked - the guy I met in Kazakhstan? The corrupt witch-doctor who tried to cure himself of impotence?

He smiled and nodded his head. Encouraged, I went on - Aren't you the one whose mother was a striptease dancer in Siberia? I remember you quite well. I remember having raped your sister. I sold her to slave traders in the Bermuda Triangle. She became the President of the United States, didn't she?

He nodded his head vigorously. I knew you'd remember - he said. He was still smiling. He put his arm around my shoulder in a rather friendly way.

And aren't you - I persisted - the guy I killed last Friday? The guy whose head I chopped off? The guy whose body I burnt?

He nodded again - Yes, yes, we're old friends, you and I. It isn't possible that you don't remember me.

I pushed him away and ran for my life. He was weird.

Chapter 3

I ran through long, convoluted corridors. Then, tired, I stopped. I saw a lady walk towards me. She was tall, with dark hair and no lipstick. She stood in front of me. She smiled. I smiled. We smiled.

Hello - I said.

She smiled again, and smooched me. We smooched for about a minute. She then punched me in the jaw and stomach. Still smiling, she walked away. I didn't follow her.

Chapter 4

When I caught my breath, I opened the door nearest to me. It was a passage. It led to the garden. The garden led to a forest. The forest led nowhere. I went to the forest.

It began to rain. I was cold, tired, miserable and wet. I was hungry too.

I was in the forest for two days. Then, I saw the little girl. She wore a pink dress. I asked her to take me away. She just kissed me on my cheek, and disappeared.

I couldn't help crying. She always makes me cry.